What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Yes sir it is.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

What role did China play in the signing of the "Beijing Declaration" between Fatah and Hamas? What other information is worth noting for talks among Palestinian factions in Beijing?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

How do I write a character’s physical description without it feeling unnatural and clunky? I’m able to describe their hair and body relatively easily because my writing puts emphasis on small movements and fidgeting, but I can’t describe faces.

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

How do I get my body in shape?

Sure no problem officer.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

{RING} {RING}

Why is that Hag Hillary Clinton so quiet these days? She is the dog that isn't barking

After a few moments he returns.

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Why do some people have sex with dogs?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

HELLO

What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

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